When Daughters Don’t Listen

My 9 year old daughter, Sari, has a mind of her own. I am sure I have mentioned that once or five times.  But how do I discipline her when the very rules she breaks end up making my day?

I turned 40 last week.  I wasn’t dreading the actual age thing. I might even say I was looking forward to it and the peace and wisdom it represents to me. My niece and nephew spent the night with us and played games and watched movies. We stayed up pretty late and I must have been distracted because I had no thoughts of birthday on my mind when I fell asleep or when I woke up.

I was startled awake early in the morning by the sounds of things clanking in my kitchen. Sari loves to make food arrangements and surprises for her Dad and me.  Unfortunately, she reaches too high, drops things, breaks things, and wants to cut and slice things, makes messes, wastes food, and doesn’t clean up well… all in the name of love.

When I woke up to the clanging in the kitchen I did not open my eyes. If I had I would have seen the giant HAPPY BIRTHDAY(a leftover from her birthday in November) balloon that was hovering at my face in bed. Instead I just yelled, “Sari! No dabbling in the kitchen unsupervised… I’ll be up soon.”  It was ridiculously early, by the way.  And I thought that was the end of it. I was wrong.

When I did finally open my eyes I saw the balloon. I then remembered someone rubbing my hands and whispering “Happy Birthday Angel” while I was asleep. The kitchen clanging finally made sense as I realized I had probably ruined her birthday surprise for me.

I tip toed out of my room to see Sari and my niece of 15 doing SOMETHING. They were making me a beautiful bouquet of flowers and balloons to set up near the breakfast platter they had prepared, as seen in the picture above. It was gorgeous.

Yes she climbed on top of the cupboards to get the decorative (and dustfilled) cups to fill with water and crystal light.  She sliced fruit without my supervision but I am told she used a butter knife on the bananas and that my niece sliced the apples.  And all the food was wasted because I don’t eat in the mornings, as my daughter knows. But all that was washed away as I took in the gift of the beautiful presentation, and the love and effort behind all the tiny things she did that morning to make sure I felt good.

How do you punish someone for that?

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