Family Bonds

Family bonds are very important for children. Throughout their lives, they will learn things, and do things that make a parent’s job very trying, but the fact that you are bonded with your child makes it that much easier. When I talk about family bonds, I am addressing not only the biological bond between a parent and his or her child; but the bonds between all children (adopted and foster children, too) with their parents, siblings, close family friends, etc. Even though your best friend may not be related biologically, if they have been around since your child was small; the child will likely regard them as family in some form!Family bonds give children a sense of where they belong, how much they matter, and security. Strengthening these bonds is much easier than most people are willing to believe, and a constant thing to strive for throughout a child’s life. Speaking from the standpoint of being in my early twenties with parents in their late thirties and early forties, I can tell you the family bond between us was not that great as I was growing up; but, it continues to get better as we are closing the age gap and better identifying with each other. My point is, though I am “grown up” in the eyes of the legal system and out of the home, continuing to bond with my parents on multiple levels is still as important now as it was the day I was born.Bonding with your children can be accomplished in a number of ways:• Play with your children and let them direct the games and other activities you do together. Feeling in control and knowing that you are willing to do whatever they ask because this is their time with you, helps them see how much you are willing to do to make them happy.
• Tell them stories about your childhood, and your life. Learning what got you to this point will help them learn about your life before parenthood; which many children fail to see. It will help them realize what all you have gone through to ensure their safety, health, and happiness, and bring you closer.

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  In honor of income taxes being due today–I thought I would take some time to discuss family finances and the IRS.  While it may be too late to look at this year (unless you are due a refund, or have a filing extension) it is never too late to look at in preparation for next year.Mind you, I am no tax pro, or legal substitute for tax information.  So please, remember to discuss any issues you see with your personal situation with the necessary experts!Itemizing is more pain than it’s worth for many families, but just because you didn’t do it this year, doesn’t mean you should ignore the option next year.  You can deduct health insurance premiums, co-pays, and many medical expenses. While there are plenty of other things to deduct, you should study up on these as your situation and tax laws change often.  You may be able to take advantage of more!Starting college?  If you or anyone in your family is currently enrolled or planning to enroll in higher education, you can take advantage of tuition credits, even if it is paid through federal aid.  This adds up to $2000 to your return!  Looking at credit possibilities this year will help you prepare for the things you want to do for credits next year.If you make less than $30,000 gross you qualify for free federal filing!  And, your state may allow free filing, too.  Many people are unaware of this, as I just found out in 2006.  That $200 filing fee for H&R block that I saved has made a big difference.  While I lost out on Rapid Refund options, I still had it within two weeks!Keep track of all your receipts, because you never know what may come in handy.  While your groceries do not matter, something purchased with them on the same transaction may be deductible!  I learned this quickly because my printer ink used as a business expense was purchased with a bean burrito from Wal-Mart.  Keeping that receipt will remind me of the $25 deduction that I otherwise would have lost…and while it is not much, it may make a difference when the final numbers are crunched!

Check out the IRS Website for more information. Photo Credit of www.upgradetravelbetter.com/2007/09/

Here’s to getting more of our own money back!  Share your tax tips and tricks below.

Since we all know how hectic it can be to find family time, we know how precious it is when we do have it. No matter the amount of the family time, it’s the quality of it that matters. Because of this, many families are on the constant look out for fun ways to spend your family time together.

So, in an effort to make your searches a little less time consuming (I know you’d rather be spending the time with your family than searching the internet for countless hours finding good stuff), here are few ideas that you can use to spend your time.

Feel free to adapt them to your time constraints, and any other issues that you may see. Of course, if you live 4 hours away from the nearest amusement park, this won’t be an option for you if finances are down, or time is limited, and this is what I mean by adapt.Have an all day/all night movie marathon. Start with a trip to your local movie rental store. If you have some advanced time, sit in front of your favorite online movie rental vendor, make your queue together, and when the movies arrive, make that your night. Pick out at least three movies, and start at a time when all of you will be alert enough to make it through an entire movie. Choose movies that the whole family will enjoy, or vary it up by letting each member pick out something that the whole family will watch. You may learn something new, or find pleasure in a film that you never expected it from. Be sure you have plenty of snacks foods on hand. You may even try making the preparation of those snacks a family affair too.

When we were newlyweds, my husband and I took several trips each year to visit family. As much as a I came to enjoy these times, being with the inlaws for “vacation” took its toll. I realized soon that what I really craved was time away with just my husband, or as children came, just my husband and kids. Taking a family trip should be a good experience for everyone involved, and it can be if you take the time to plan a family trip together.

Have a group discussion as you plan the annual (or seasonal) family trip. Ask each family member to come with a list of likes and dislikes to contribute to the planning session. For example, Mom might have “ocean or lake” on her likes list and “camping” on her dislikes list, among other things. This could be countered by her son’s list naming “tent camping” under likes and “hotels” under dislikes. Compromise and work together. Would a cabin on a lake be an effective solution to Mom and son’s diverging ideas? Could son bring a tent to set up by the cabin? What other options would find mutual support? While some compromises are important, it is important that each family member like something – hopefully, several things – about the planned family trip.

How do you balance the work life, with the home life? Any work-at-home parent faces this battle daily. The delicate balance between the two is difficult for many of us to maintain. Even if we manage to maintain the balance perfectly one day, it is uncertain whether we will be able to maintain it the next, or if ever again! The most we can do is strive to better our time management skills, as this is the key to obtaining a balance between the two lives. So, here are some time management tips that will help any work-at-home parent in the never ending battle of balancing work and family!Plan, Schedule, and Prioritize. Take time each day to plan the next. If you know what you have to do, then you will have a better chance of getting through your list each day. In addition to your planning, you will want to focus on priority, making sure you get to the most important things first. Many people prioritize by time consumption; however, this is not always the best way to go. Scheduling helps, but with children in the home, you cannot always stick to it. Whatever schedule you make, keep it flexible, and do not get down if you cannot follow it.

Take this Life Balance Quiz, and see what it tells you!  (It will open in a new window!)

And as always, share what works and what does not work for you when it comes to this delicate balance!

Recent national and world events aside, emergency preparedness just makes sense. For me, the peace of mind knowing that I could feed my family for a month without going to the grocery store is enough to keep me replenishing our stash. My husband wanted to know that we could survive for a time without electricity if we really had to, and installed an old-fashioned wood-burning stove for heat and emergency cooking. Here are some emergency preparedness ideas to help you start:

Have a written plan. Meet as a family to discuss your written emergency preparedness plans. Create plans for disasters that have a history in your region (earthquake, flood, tornado) as well as their effects, such as extended loss of power.

Spring Break can be a hectic time of year for any family who has not planned a vacation, or saves their family vacation for the summer break. So, what should you do to entertain your children while they are home from school on Spring Break? Here are seven ways to entertain your children to keep them busy, and out of trouble.

Invite Friends Over. Allow the children to have a group of friends over for the night. If you have more than child that do not have a mutual circle of friends, allow each child to have a night with friends. This will give them something to look forward to, and something you can use as leverage if necessary. It may cause a headache for you, but it will be worth it, especially if the child’s behavior warrants a reward.

Have a Family Movie Fest. Make each night special by watching a movie as a family. If you cannot spread the movies out over the week, try watching several movies together on one night of the week, as this will leave the rest of the week open for other plans.

Host a Barbeque. Use the newfound warm weather as an excuse to get together and celebrate with friends and family. Enjoy the time with food, drink, and social activity. The kids will be occupied with all the company, and you can engage them for help in the kitchen or on the grill. Plus, it gives you an excuse to catch up with the people you do not keep in touch with often.

Arts and Crafts. Take the kids to a craft store and let them pick out things that will spark their interest and give them something productive to do while you are away at work. For instance, you could try cross-stitching, painting, building a model car, coloring a poster, etc.

Spring Cleaning. Though this is probably the least appealing activity on the list for the children, you could certainly use their help, as they help mess up the house, right? You can use this as motivation for other activities, like letting their friends come visit overnight.

 Go Shopping. This activity will certainly go further if you have daughters, but everyone can use shopping as a great excursion, and there is something everyone wants to buy. It will keep the kids busy for the majority of the day if you want it to, so it will be a great time killer, and can provide some great quality time.

Re-Decorate. This ties into the cleaning activity a bit, but you can allow the children to re-decorate their bedrooms, or help you to re-decorate a common area of the home. The possibilities here are endless, and you can allow the children’s imaginations run wild. By now, you should have a good idea of what you are going to do to entertain the children over the spring break. Do not stress the break too much, because soon enough they will be back in school. But, use it for some much needed family and relaxation time, and you all will rested, and relaxed.

What do you do to keep the children occupied on breaks?  Share your thoughts and ideas below.

Photo Credit of: SD DSS

Raising a healthy family means different things to different people. So, while I will not be able to provide advice that works for everyone, I certainly am going to provide the basis that may help you in raising your family the healthy way. Start with your definition of a healthy family, and then develop your plan of action on how you are going to do it. Finally, evaluate periodically to see where you stand in your goals. Purely as an example, I will use my own definitions, goals, and current evaluation to show you what I mean.

My family started close to five years ago. Young, and impressionable, I knew nothing but what my family had shown me. With this, I decided to develop my family strategies based on what I loved about my family, while also changing my approaches to the things I thought could have been handled differently. For instance, if my mother said something in hopes to get one response, but trigged another and it backfired; here is where my adjustment would be made to match what I think would have worked better (speaking from the child point of view, not the parent).For me, health means strength, unity, and trust within the family home. It means keeping your mind, body, and soul healthy. You must, as a parent, be healthy before you can work on raising your children to be healthy.

My child must be balanced with a variety of interests in what he chooses, so long as they are not detrimental to him or others around him. Morals and values are not optional. No question, even inappropriate, will ever be left unanswered. I will only alter my answer from the truth if he is not mature enough for it. He should and will be able to speak to me about anything, anytime, forever…never being afraid to tell me the truth. He should continue to strive to reach higher levels than the generations before him. My husband and I are a team, no matter what, and will act as such at all times! These are my goals as of the writing of this blog, and in having yet to delete a goal from this list since I started my raising my family; I know that I will continue to add them as I become a bit wiser.I will carry out this plan through patience, honesty, trust, loyalty, and compassion toward my family; while making it known that I expect, and deserve the same in return. If I do not receive this emotion we must reconsider the definition of a team! Continuing to work on bettering myself, will only strengthen the familial bonds that raising a healthy family needs. My evaluation of these same goals today, is positive. While it has not been easy for us, every day we continue to work toward these goals in some fashion. I can say that I always answer his questions, even if they are the same ones he has asked many times, and if I know he already knows the answer. Some of them do require an alternate explanation, but are as close to the truth as he needs right now. It keeps the conversation going, which is wonderful. Encouraging him to learn and keeping him interested in many things means that I am on my way for now.