Growing Happy Kids

I joke a lot about how wild my kids are and how my Hubby is a ManChild. (A nickname lovingly bestowed upon him by my Dad who TRULY couldn’t love him more if he was his own son.) And although it is true that marriage and parenthood brought out a crankiness in me that I never knew existed, there is not a move I make on this earth that does not have the sole purpose at the root to maintain a happy house and grow happy kids.

A few examples would include

• When I accept another job it is not to further my career or get rich. It is to enrich my household in the form of summer vacation, extra curricular programs for the kids, movies at the IMAX (guilty pleasure), or extra spending after hours spent at Barnes & Noble devouring the shelves and filling our arms.
• When I begin yet another diet it is no longer to try and look good in a swimsuit. It is to have the energy to play ball and jump on the trampoline with my kids and to restore my confidence so that they don’t have to miss out on beach time because I am insecure.
• When I talk about my Mother, and tell the kids how she would have doted on them and spoiled them and hardly ever let them out of her sight if she’d had the opportunity to meet them before she passed, it is no longer to console me for needing her to help me be a good mom. But to make them feel the crazy love and specialness that every kid should feel.
• When I wake up Saturday morning and make the chore charts for the weekend that is SOOOO for me! But the bonus is it benefits them too and gives them a sense of independence and accomplishment.

The difficult part of this, for Moms in particular, is the danger of sacrificing everything that it is important to them on behalf of the family. Being a learn-it-the-hard-way sort, I went down this path and it is brutal and has the opposite affect of the desired outcome. My journey has taught me that I can put my kids above all else and still have some joy for myself. I mean look at my list, by thinking of my kids first, I actually have some pretty cool stuff put in place for me!

At tough times we might catch ourselves thinking our kids are ungrateful and supremely self centered. But in my experience, sacrificing to the point of near martyrdom did nothing to make my kids happy. It wasn’t until I figured out how to prioritize all four of us that my kids really started to blossom.

Which brings us full circle and proves that even by making time and allowing a few spoils for myself, I do so with the sole purpose of growing happy kids.

So Ladies, if you aren’t spoiling yourself at all, I am here to tell you that you are doing your family a disservice. And if you are spoiling yourself, Dish! What’s your favorite treat?!