Monthly Archives: January 2009

Late for School Cus Mom’s in LaLa Land!

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I can’t believe I am going to admit this.  But I have to.  And I hope I get comments saying some of you have done the same.  If not… well, it’s not like anybody REALLY knows who I am anyway.  Except Mama Mar and a handful of dear friends who support my writing dreams by stopping in every day to give me traffic.  And they surely already have suspicions about how many sandwiches I have in my picnic basket already.  So here it is.  My Son was late for school today and it was my fault.

Not such a big deal, you say?  But I partially woke up and turned the alarm clock off.  If I could have looked down at myself I’m sure I would have been smiling.  I didn’t fully wake up because I was so involved in my happy dream.

Understandable you say?

I was dreaming that I was playing the lead role in High School Musical 4.

How about now?

I know it sounds crazy but I was SINGING and DANCING and SMILING!  I had on the cutest retro Nancy Sinatra style jumper and boots-were-made-for-walkin’ boots… the whole ensemble wouldn’t have covered one side of my body in reality… but there I was.  Giggling with Kenny Ortega and the camera guy.  (cus giggling with Zac Efron & Corbin Bleu would have been creepy, right?)

If you have read my recent gushing over the vampire Edward in the Twilight movie, or my latest weight loss plan to mirror my Son’s diet you might be now be wondering if the thread that holds me together is loosening.  Maybe.

But when is the last time you hopped across a stage dancing and singing and not one bone or joint in your body hurt while doing so?! :-)   Well that was a good moment for me and I wanted to savor it!  Andrew’s art class be damned!

I still feel kind of limber and bubbly and I’ve been up for hours.  Dreams really are amazing things.  Do you have a good one to share?

Household Computer Survey

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I was just writing about my kids bedrooms and it got me wondering just how many kids do have computers in their rooms.  If you have a minute please leave me a comment about the computers in your house.  Laptop computer vs. desktop computer, how many do you have, how many kids, and their ages, are sharing them, which ones have internet connection, which are etc.  My children tell me that all of their friends have computers in their rooms and I just wonder…

Thanks!

What is in Your Kids Bedrooms?

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I had some time while hubby was in Texas for a couple of weeks to sit back and observe things.  The house, the kids, our routines, what’s working, what’s not… that kind of thing.  One thing that really struck me in need of change is my kids bedrooms.

There was not a lot of time to prepare when we learned the agency had found two children to bring into our home.  Maybe a long weekend?  Not that it would have mattered much in terms of decorating since Hubs likes off white walls, off white carpet, neutral neutral neutral.  I really was doomed from the start.  I just didn’t know it.

My youngest is an artist.  Can you imagine what her off white walls and off white carpet look like?  Now that she is a bit older I set her up an art area in the basement so that the paint, markers, glue, glitter, playdoh, etc. is not even allowed in her room anymore.  We will be painting in the spring… a nice shade of “bone” for sure.  Not sure what will become of the flooring.

My Son is older and his room has less obvious stuff.  You look around and you see a TV, a hamster cage, a homework area, school supplies, textbooks, and bunk beds.  Pretty clean.  It is what you don’t see that scares me.  Candy wrappers, peanuts, pasta, bread, slim jim remnants, wrappers, dishes, and crumbs of all kinds in every nook and cranny.  His top bunk needs caution tape wrapped around it for all the toxic stashed food he has up there.  I put him to work cleaning out all the hot spots but come spring his room is going to need an overhaul too.

Both my kids want a laptop computer in their rooms.  My daughter, at 9, is way too young.  Neither are responsible enough to take care of one.  We don’t have the money to accommodate that wish, anyway, so obviously, that is not going to happen.  But take away all those reasons.  I still don’t think I would do it.

Computers are awesome and I would love for my kids to each have their own so that they could do their homework, access their classroom online, research things that interest them, etc.  But the internet just worries me too much.  I know there are locks and safety features but the fact that some very bad and scary stuff is just a click away is too much for me.  We have a computer in the living room that everyone can use and I can see the screen at all times.

I know as my kids get older I will have to modify this policy, but I can’t imagine what age that will be.  Where are your computers?  How old was your child when s/he got a computer with internet in their room?

Sibling Rivalry

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I don’t really have any tips or advice to offer on this topic.  I actually need your help.  My kids fighting is driving me nuts!

I have mentioned before how much I love Supernanny but I have learned that that love has limits.  When I am watching the show, in a good and calm state of mind, I absorb everything like a sponge.  It all makes sense.  But when I am fired up and looking for specific guidance she just ticks me off.  At those times I want to beat her over the head with her “techniques”.  I like SAYING “technique” when talking about the solution to a problem that does not affect me.  But I don’t like it being recommened to me when I am in a foul mood.

I also don’t want to be told how to breathe properly (a breathing technique!) to diffuse my heightened irritation.  I looked up “ADD” in her guide, at a time I was fired up, and she told me that I had to just accept the fact that I couldn’t be in control of every situation when it comes to my ADD kid, that I needed to learn to compromise.  And breathe.  Doesn’t that sound crazy?

I guess it really doesn’t now that I think about it from a calm state of mind.  That breathing thing is a great tip.  I taught my kids to use it themselves when they are frustrated with me or one another.  Funny that they have mastered it when it comes to me.  They can handle their anger through breathing when it comes to me but not when dealing with each other.

The only trigger involved when the fights begin between my son and daughter is that they are both present.  As soon as on walks in the same room as the other BAM! They are poking and prodding and yelling at each other.  In all other areas my kids are great.  For the most part they listen, they do their chores, they do homework and work hard at school, but when they get in their zone they cannot even hear me trying to settle them down.

I was an only child and I cannot understand this behavior.  I guess when it gets right down to it, it is not the issue of handling it that is turning me gray, but just understanding WHY.

Anyone?

Kids and Weight Loss

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I know that at nine years old I don’t need to be addressing weight loss with my daughter, even though that jelly belly makes it extremely difficult for me to dress her! :-)   But I wonder at what point it does become an issue.

My hopeful answer is that if i do my job right it never will become an issue.

Some may disagree but I think that I do need to address her weight now, but quietly.  Even though she is only 9 and being “thin” is not a concern to us, being healthy is.  Too much sugar and fat present a health risk at any age and obesity among young children has become terribly common.

My son, by contrast, is very thin.  We encourage him to eat three helpings of pasta while cutting my daughter off at one.  It seems unfair at first but we realized that she is four years younger than him and we had been feeding them the same portions because they LOOK about the same size.  Duh!

There are times when she grumbled about the unfairness of it all but the only explanation we have given her is the real issue… Her brother is older and therefore requires more food.  I also learned to treat her with a fancy fruit dessert or sherbet and she feels better about things.

As important as a kids nutrition is exercise.  Winter time does not provide many opportunities for kids activities on a daily basis.  Not surprisingly my daughter carries more weight around her tummy in the winter than she does during summer vacation when she’s swimming and riding her bike every day.

I agree that addressing weight with children can send a bad message if done improperly, and could promoteinsecurity, especially among girls.  But completely ignoring it creates more problems down the road.

Do you remember being a teenager?  Or even a ‘tween?   Were you by chance a “chubby” one?  I was and I haven’t forgotten how cruel kids can be.  By high school I was bulimic and taking diet pills.  Not because anyone had made me insecure at home, but because of how I was treated in school.  I can remember being called fat as early as 3rd grade and someone sticking up for me saying, “She’s not fat, she’s just getting her big girl boobies already.”  It sounds funny now, but those comments can turn into a lifetime of weight disorders.  I think I would rather take my chances and deal with it now, in the privacy and safety of home, than send my prone to weight gain daughter out into the cruel world of middle schoolers.

I would love to hear any of your experiences with your children and weight management.  We can all help eachother out on this one I think.

Will a Treadmill be Mine in ’09?

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Geez, does anybody else feel yucky right now?  First all the eating from Thanksgiving through New Years.  Now that all the decorations are put away my house looks so empty and I sometimes feel trapped inside of it with nothing to do.  I have some great workout dvds but what I really want is a treadmill.

I was a fintess finatic in the nineties.  I spent hours at the gym and I started and finished every workout with a vigorous run on the stairmaster.  Remember what a beautiful piece of equipment that was when it first came out?  I thought the treadmill was boring and only used it when the lines for the stairc climbers were too long.

I have a basic stair climber in my basement but the excitement is gone from it.  I do kind of enjoy the elliptical when I go to the gym.  But nothing gets my heart pumping and my joy pipes bursting like putting on my mp3 player and pounding it out on the treadmill.  I have never considered buying one, though, because our budget has tightened over the last couple of years, as has that of just about everybody.

But on the other hand, exercise is really important and I am not getting much of it.  If the treadmill is what motivates me to exercise than maybe it moves from a “want” to a “need”.  I thought about this today as I was thinking about a business associate of mine who does most of the home inspections for my home buyers.  Literally one week he was working strong and the next week he retired.  We learned that he had recently been diagnosed with mesothelioma and it had quickly deteriorated his ability to work.

It is never too early to take care of yourself but as we advance in years I think it’s crucial to keep the bad stuff at bay and make us most able to fight off the bugs that do get us.

I won’t make any hasty decisions about that treadmill but I will reorganize my thoughts and consider it more carefully if my Yoga Booty Ballet and Turbo Jam workouts fail to motivate me to exercise!

Blogging for Vacations!

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Well I have had the blues today for some reason.  My doctor diagnosed me a couple of years ago with seasonal affective disorder because I hit some real lows in the winter.  Although I agree that I may have some lower lows from December to March than I do from April to September, I think everyone experiences this to some degree, right?  Do you?  I think I am just coming down off Christmas and exhausted from working in these extreme temperatures.  Whatever the case, when this frigid cabin fever hits I think about OTHER places.

So yesterday I was thinking about a lazy, relaxing trip to North Carolina.  A friend pointed out to me that I don’t need a lazy vacation.  I barely have a pulse right now as it is.  She suggested what I need is sunshine, fun, and music.  The picture she painted in my mind got me giggling and thinking about Branson, Missouri! Talk about a mismatch!

I hate country music and never imagined wanting to go there.  But just for fun I googled it in case the universe was trying to send me a message by embedding the thought in my mind in the first place.  You know what?  It DOES look fun!

At first I was reminded of the trip to Opryland I took with my Family when I was a kid.  I rode my first roller coaster and I saw Dottie West in concert at the Grand Ol’ Opry when I was 8.  That’s pretty cool.  Suddenly my mind was becoming more open.

My family loves theme parks and rides so Silver Dollar City caught my eye right away.  Just looking at the pictures of the people screaming with arms flailing riding the roller coasters cheered me up.  My blues started melting.  I found lots of shows ranging from magic to musicals that looked like a lot of fun.  Hold up!  Was I smiling at the thought of going to my PARENT’S uncool vacation destination?

Here’s the thing.  I think I was misinformed.  Sometimes you get a notion in your head as a teenager that whatever your parents would like is dumb and not cool.  Geez Louise though, just think what we could miss out on over the years by dismissing things for silly reasons without taking the time to investigate. And if just pictures of Branson’s attractions and elegant hotels cheered me up, imagine what an actual visit could do.

I am sure that few of us would categorize ourselves as being closed minded.  I know I didn’t think I was until I realized I had shut out pieces of the world and slices of life just because they were things my parents enjoyed. (EW!) I think I will rethink some things and think outside my box.  Try a new vacation spot… sample some different music… read a different genre of book, etc.  After all, my parents never steered my wrong before.  And just think… what if I had never tried coffee!

Is it Summer Yet? Almost Spring?

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Are we coming in like a lion right now?  I never understood that expression exactly, but it seems to me that since we had a lot of snow for Christmas and are continuing to have our cold bottoms handed to us on a chilled platter, I say it qualifies for lion status.  Which means winter should soon just quietly and meekly leave. Right?

Winter and the holidays have been fun though.

Did you see our gingerbread house?

We had snow days and didn’t comb our hair.

We built snowmen.

For the first time I (drank bloody marys) and let go of the reigns to allow the kids put the bulbs wherever they wanted on the Christmas tree.  (They did SUPER!)

We got Wii!

But enough is enough already.  My skin is rashed and burned from showing houses in extreme weather.  My metal flag pole got blown over flat to the ground and buried under feet of snow.  It’s too cold to play and make snow angels.  I just want to cozy up and eat ice cream.  That doesn’t even make any sense! See? I think I need a warm vacation. Not Vegas, too hustle bustleish.  Not Orlando.  Too structured and busy.  How about something like the Outer Banks rentals of North Carolina.  Just relaxing and warm enough.  Although I have no idea what the weather is like there right now.  It’s only on my mind since I heard the movie Nights of Rodanthe was filmed there.  I didn’t see the movie but I loved the book.  The setting was lazy and comfy on the beach.

The only lazy and comfy I am going to get for awhile is probably curled up with a blanket and a good book after everyone goes to bed at night.  Maybe I’ll read the Secret again and visualize myself warm.  Oh! And skinny!  Aaaaaah.  Feeling better already.

A Mom and a Bomb Threat

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Something out of the ordinary happened to me the other day.  My reaction in     contrast with the reactions of those around me was surprising.  How I processed it was interesting.

I was at a Super Walmart in Grand Blanc a couple of Sundays ago.  I don’t ordinarily shop at Walmart.  I love Kroger because Mama Mar runs the best store in Michigan. :-)   Plus I am uncomfortable with the politics and controversy surrounding Walmart.  This day, however, I was on that side of town, we were out of EVERYTHING and for the sake of convenience I decided to shop there.

After spending an hour and a half stuffing my cart (I told you we were out of everything!) I was just browsing the deli area when the announcement was made, “Attention Walmart Shoppers.  Due to circumstances beyond our control we must ask you to leave your unpurchased items and exit the store in a calm and orderly fashion.”

Then, as if knowing we would all be wondering if we heard correctly, the message was repeated.

What would you do at this point?

I am sure my head tilted as I considered what I had just heard.  Then I glanced up at the exit signs and assessed if the closest doors to me were getting crowded yet.  The exits were clear.  I located my keys, picked up my purse and calmly and briskly walked out.  I heard a deli boy apologizing behind me for my inconvenience.  I was sure that getting caught up in whatever was going on would have been much more of an inconvenience than two hours of wasted shopping time.

On my way out I heard grumbling so I looked around.  People were complaining.  They were picking little fights and pitching little tantrums.  Someone wanted a gift card for her trouble.  I shook my inner head and forged forward.  In no way could I have been described as anything but casually walking out the door, yet I was what seemed like a mile ahead of everyone else.

As I backed out of my parking spot I looked in my rear view mirror to see all the doors bust open and a mob of people pouring out.  What in the world took them so long?  I can only guess they continued to grumble for a few minutes. As for me, I drove through the closest restaurant, KFC, and scurried home to hug my kids.

My first thought was that there had been a bomb threat and it turns out I was right.  I didn’t find out until a couple of days later and my mind went crazy with “what if”s.  On one hand I think I am being dramatic by letting it get to me.  Surely it was a prank.  But then again, these things do happen.  How do you distinguish what deserves to be treated seriously until it’s too late?

The thing that leaves me most puzzled is the people who stuck around long enough to complain.  We didn’t know it was a bomb threat at the time, but you have to consider that Walmart would not send away a store filled with people and their money on a busy Sunday afternoon without something serious going on.  I never for a moment felt upset over the time I spent shopping and having to leave my cart behind.  The only thing on my mind was that my kids were home alone and I needed to get back to them.

Have you ever experienced such an adventure?  How did you feel afterward?


Mom’s Return to Routine

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This is a big week for America and for me in particular.  Barack Obama takes office and my auto worker husband goes back to work. Yipppeeeee!

As Americans we are excited.  We don’t expect to wake up and find a repaired and thriving country overnight, but we have hope!  There is a buzz of optimism in the air. We are motivated and ready to go to work.  What will happen over the next four years can only be speculated. But at this moment right now, anything can happen!

We cannot put too much on our new president, though.  It doesn’t matter how good our leader is if we do not do our parts.  We have to work for it, it will not be handed to us.  America was once a great place because it was a place where people could come to achieve the American Dream.  Those people worked for it though.  Today we think it is entitled to us.  It isn’t enough to dream the dream.  We have to reach for it.

Oh but we’ve become jaded over the years. Depressed. Hopeless.  Sometimes we DID reach and we DID do the work, but nothing happened.  “The man” didn’t want us to thrive.  Guess what! There’s a NEW “Man” in town and he wants us to thrive, to succeed, to LIVE!

Now I don’t mean to brag, but I for one will be thriving a little bigger than everyone else this week.  Not only am I all hopped up on patriotism and hope, but my Hubby, who was on and off work all last year goes back to work after a solid five weeks off. Yipppeeeee!

Not that his five weeks off did not have value.  Why, thanks to that time off my Hubby was able to teach me the “proper” way to load the dishwasher and how to REALLY clean the kitchen.  I also learned that my job at home is really easy and Hubs even counseled me on how better to manage my real estate clients.  It was all really super and I am sad to see him go back to work.

Oh wait. I got caught up in my own sarcasm.  I am not sad at all! I am THRILLED!  Although I am coming to accept that my “routine” is to actually not have a routine, (thanks to so much inconsistency in Hub’s work and kid’s schedules) I am still excited to have my home office to myself again and put back together my version of routine. Now if only I could get the weather to cooperate so we quit having all these snow days!

What are you excited about as our new administration begins?