Time to Put Up the Lights?

It’s time to bring in the patio cushions, cover the grill, and empty the flower pots.  What a bummer. Winter itself can be so pretty when the snow covered trees and landscape sparkle like a winter wonderland.  But day to day, until the lights go up, my house looks kind of ugly.

I often laugh at how early people put their Christmas lights and decorations up but suddenly I think I get it.  It’s because they are thinking ahead how bad the back deck and yard looks once the frigid cold hits and all the leaves and flowers are gone.  They are being proactive because they know that once it gets to that ugly point where you want to hang lights and plant blinking deer… it’s too late! It’s so cold your little fingers feel like they’re going to break right off while wrapping the garland around the mailbox.

Suddenly, instead of making fun of the early  decorators, I think they are geniuses.  What I misread as overly enthusiastic holiday cheer is actually advanced planning and strategy.  I still plan to put the Christmas tree up the day after Thanksgiving, but I think I’ll start planning my outdoor holiday decorating so I’ll be prepared whenever that one or two nice days hit after Halloween.

When do you put up your holiday decs?  Better yet… When do you take them down? There’s a whole other topic!

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At the beginning of the 2008  school year I got more aggressive on behalf of my Son who struggles with severe ADHD and was having a tough time in school.  At the time he was entering 7th grade and I knew we were running out of time to find successful strategies for him before he heads to the high school.  6th grade was terrible. 7th was stressful but a huge improvement.  So far 8th grade is even better.

What is responsible for the improvements? Finally finding the right ADHD treatment for us, and the change from a 504 to an IEP at school.

With regards to treatment we have been experimenting with medications and dosages for years. We finally found the one that allows him to best focus at school but still allows him to have an appetite and sleep at night.

Despite our struggles in school, all the school would do for my son is qualify him for a 504.  Basically a 504 mandates the removal of potential barriers in the student’s education but, unlike the IEP,  does not provide any special tools or assistance.  In addition to even light amounts of homework taking hours to do after school, Andrew struggled inside the classroom.  After staying up all night doing his homework, he would get nervous and distracted and either forget to pull it out of his backpack for each class, or stuff it in his desk while the other kids were passing forward or dropping on the teacher’s desk.  During timed tests he would drift off.  Classroom distractions prevented him from hearing much of the teacher’s instruction. 6th grade resulted in many D’s, E’s, tears, confrontation, and eventually a mama meltdown at school.

In 7th grade I started off much more firm and prepared, and demanded a meeting and walked in with my list of demands.  I could tell the new team of teachers and support had already drawn their conclusions about me, based on communications with the previous team. Regardless, I was able to convince them that the 504 wasn’t working and the IEP is what we needed.  There was still a lot of struggle at home at homework time and on behalf of the teachers to help him remember to turn things in and stay focused during class, but his grades soared. And the teachers slowly came around and understood that Andrew was facing challenges, not being a slacker.

As the first marking period of 8th grade comes to an end, our biggest struggle seems to be getting him to sit still long enough to do his homework after school, since his medication is wearing off. During school, however, thanks to just a few strategies put in place in the classroom and Andrew’s new found confidence in his abilities and relationships with teachers, he has made improvements beyond my expectations.

Age and maturity has a lot to do with this I am sure. “He will grow out of some of it” is something I have heard a lot over the last five years but had a hard time believing and counting on because we had no control over when or if that would happen.  What we did have control over is working with his doctor to make sure he was taking the right medication and working with the school until we found the strategies that worked for him.

Did you get a chance to see Extreme Home Makeover this weekend? I think this week, The Hill Family, might have been my favorite house. I always love the stories and the families, and the Hill Family was no exception. But the appearance really appealed to me this week.

We have watched some magnificent houses being built on this show, haven’t we? I am mostly drawn to the sprawling ranches with the peaks and stone and huge windows. You know, the progressive stuff. But this week a little calm washed over me when the bus pulled away and revealed the grand two story waiting to be toured. The house, for me, was the perfect blend of old style and contemporary. I could see their big ol’ family gathering and welcoming friends and family into their home, creating new memories and continuing to give back and enrich the lives of others.

The inside was a little more modern than the outside, but still very warm and inviting. The colors outside and in are so tranquil and that dining room table was really special. The lower level, dedicated to the teenage boys was amazing but a little flashy for me. I will say that I loved that flashy wall game. There always has to be something breath taking and one of a kind, doesn’t there?

I would love to have my house redone, who wouldn’t, right? Someone needs to produce a show to help home owners who are not quite in as desperate situations as the Extreme Home Makeover people. People whose maintenance is BECOMING overwhelming but they haven’t quite lost it yet. Those would require smaller budgets and would maybe save a lot of people from going into those dire straits. Or maybe folks with special needs that don’t need a whole rebuild, maybe just some specializing to meet their wants/needs, like walk in tubs, finished basement with playroom and privacy for growing family, new windows and a roof… whatever the case may be. Think something in scale between QUEER EYE FOR THE STRAIGHT GUY and EXTREME HOME MAKE OVER. That’d be cool.

For my make over I don’t think I want anything elaborate. Maybe some more windows put in where the builder skimped, um… finished basement with laundry room, office & play area. OH! And a fancy multi head shower! That would be my luxury splurge. How about you?

Here’s a tour of the Hill House if you would like to see it.

I know that I can save a few bucks a month on my satellite bill  if I plug into a phone line.  But what’s $5? I don’t have time to deal with that.  I bet I could trim a couple dollars off my home phone bill, though,  because we don’t use the land line for anything but the occasional fax. It’s kind of a pain to figure out though.  I’ll do it later.  I don’t have an RV why would I need motorhome towing on my insurance policy?  And how did it get there in the first place?  I need to check on that right away.  And while I’m thinking about it… my cell phone bill is awfully high.  I’ll put that on my list to check out too.

The above is my thought process for the several months.  Every time realization of something wasteful hit me I was busy in the middle of something and thought “it’s only a few bucks.  No biggie.  I’ll get to it.”  Then I one day realized that all of those $5/10/20 savings added up to a lot of money!  So I got to work.

I actually still don’t have a phone line hooked up for our satellite dish because I can’t figure out a convenient patch to take the wire.  But I DID learn that I was being overcharged for an outdated plan that no longer exists AND I realized that I was paying rent on a unit we weren’t even using.  I also  learned I was paying ridiculous amounts on my cell phone bill for information calls, games, ringtones, etc.

No, it was not fun to make all these phone calls and wait on hold and figure everything out.  It was pretty frustrating and I did feel like my head was going to explode at times.  But at a time when milk for the cereal has  sometimes been a luxury lately, I feel pretty stupid that I didn’t do it sooner.  Not many of us have money to throw away these days and every dollar counts so I wanted to let you know that I uncovered almost a hundred dollars per month just reviewing my basic monthly bills and expenditures, and encourage you to do the same.

Everyone has an agenda. Everybody is trying to accomplish something. Most everybody is trying to sell you something. Even people who wish the very best for you, still have their own best interests at heart, so their advice to you might not truly be your “best” advice. With all the mixed messages and tainted counsel floating around, how do you really know what’s BEST for you?

We are the products of a lifetime of being programmed that the best is… well, THE BEST! Strive for the best! Accept nothing but the best! You deserve the best! But what is “the best?” Especially in tough economic times like these, we might want to reconsider the whole concept. Otherwise we are likely to find ourselves feeling of failure because we were unable to achieve those misguided ideas of what is “best” for us.

Price and quality. Keeping the kitchen stocked is a challenge right now for even the most stable families. Is there any bigger failure than not being able to provide food for your family? I remember there used to be a commercial for JIF peanut butter on TV when I was a kid. There was a mom saying that her kids are too precious to scrimp on and they only get the best, that’s why she only gives them JIF. They programmed that into me at that early age so that all through my life I thought I was neglecting my body to buy a different peanut butter. As a new mom it never crossed my mind to do so. As finances became tighter, it DID cross my mind, but for reasons unrealized to me at the time, I would not let myself buy anything other than JIF. I was experimenting with generic brands and changing our menus, but I was hell bent on sticking with JIF peanut butter. Then one day I was at Gordon’s bulk foods and they had this monster big jar of peanut butter for the same price as a regular jar of JIF. So we weren’t just talking about the few cents difference I’ve seen at the grocery store. It was like a cool splash of water in my face. I woke up from Jif’s genius marketing brainwash and I bought the Gordon’s peanut butter. Everyone loves it. Fraction of the price and I have to buy less frequently. It is a no brainer to me that THAT is the BEST choice for me.

Cheaper is not always better . JIF is just my example. It might not be YOUR best peanut butter. But it is worth checking out. It is worth the time to try some new brands and products. A few cents or a few dollars might not be worth a change to you if you feel you are sacrificing taste or quality. But SEVERAL dollars off a grocery bill would be welcome, I’m sure. FYI Kroger lets you return Kroger brand products if you try them and don’t like them. So there is no financial risk.

THE BEST by definition. THE BEST DIET PILLS are only the best diet pills if you can access it. Adipex might kill your appetite the best of all, but good luck getting it. You can get Stackers over the counter at a lower cost without the headache of a doctor’s appointment. You might not lost weight as fast, but you will see results. As opposed to “no results” from Adipex because you can’t get it. A COLLEGE EDUCATION is not necessarily your “best” course of action for the future if you can’t afford one. College tuition is skyrocketing despite the fact that families are struggling. THE BEST SCHOOL DISTRICT is not the best district for you if politics and cliques over shadow your child’s education. THE BEST is only the best if provides optimum results FOR YOU in YOUR situation, under YOUR circumstances.

The point is, we are all different. Our tastes, desires, passions, opportunities, talents, skills, goals, preferences, and so on… all unique. So for a choice, a brand, a store, a restaurant…. for ANYTHING to claim title of “the best” is ridiculous. What’s more ridiculous is for us to believe it. No body or no thing can claim to be “the best” for me. Only through trial and error, experience, and effort can I make that decision. That’s the best advice I can give.

You know what one of the biggest distractions for me is when I am out showing houses? Baby gates!  Isn’t that funny?  I skipped the whole baby and toddler stage with my kids so when I am in a kid proofed house I get completely distracted.  For one thing because I am amazed by how clever some things are, and for another because I get frustrated by inability to work the work the dang gadgets!

I have been embarrassed on more than one occasion when I couldn’t get upstairs to the next part of the tour of a house and had to ask the potential buyer to get the stairway gate open.

There is a website called KidSafeInc.com that offers everything you need to keep your kids and even your pets safe and where they need to be.  If you’re into social media like me you can follow them on Facebook, Twitter, You Tube, and the KidSafe Blog

I like this time of the year when the sun is still warm but the breeze is cold.  It is toasty during the day and chilly late at night and early in the morning.  It’s the time when you stop wishing you had central air and find yourself thinking about heated floors. 

Heated tile floors is one of those things on my mind for my “dream house” one day.  I always thought they were a difficult expensive home feature.  Maybe not.  New, more affordable products are being developed so that anyone can have the luxury of warm floors, even on a budget. You can even save money by installing the radiant heat tubing yourself which comes with a how to install heated floors manual.

I know slippers are cheaper and fun to pick out.  But they are hard to keep up with.  And the cutest ones keep falling off my feet anyway!  Wouldn’t it be nice to tip toe out into the kitchen onto heated tile floors first thing in the morning for a hot cup of coffee?  <sigh>  One day.

I think education is in an odd spot right now. I draw this conclusion based on my own experiences.

I left college in 1988 or 9 just shy of an associate’s degree in something or other. I wasn’t on the right track to begin with then had some medical situations to deal with. Up until this point I have never wished to go back. I have taken a few literature classes just to stay sharp and have an excuse to write. Other than that, I have been too lucky with employment and salary to regret it.

Now I’m 40, working real estate when my mother of two children schedule allows it, and find myself pursuing the writing I wanted to do when I was nineteen but didn’t have the proper guidance. I was pushed into psychology and sociology because that’s what my profile recommended, and advised that the writing classes fill up too quickly and probably a waste of time. I only have about 3 do over requests in my life time. Accepting that advice is one of them.

So now I’m selling a little and I’m writing. And have also fallen into social media. I LOVE it. Feel passionate about it as in “change is in the air” excitement. I wonder if I am in the middle of a technology revolution. Historically speaking, I wonder at what point during revolutions past did folks actually realize that something big was really happening?

Anyway, I want to learn more about it. I am also suddenly craving that degree I never got now that I finally have this keen direction. I can’t afford it today, I don’t think, but I’m researching my options. I KNOW it will be challenging to juggle a school schedule with family. I need to think about that too. You might say, “I did it, you can too.” And I know you’re right. I am just thinking about how very needy my family is and not necessarily helpful around the house. I wonder if I want to bring on that extra stress right now.

Then I think… what about online courses? We are living in an internet & technology age. Surely there is education available out there. But as I look I find that there really isn’t that much available, accredited, that I feel good about. I am still looking. I did find this though. A private Catholic school I never heard of called Gonzaga University offers an online masters degree in NURSING and in COMMUNICATIONS! Two fields that will always be relevant.

Now for you snooty toots who think that such offerings diminish a school’s value… Gonzaga feels that it is accommodative to experienced professionals who want to continue their education but otherwise may not be able to due to commitments and obligations they already have with career and family. And if you wonder about Gonzaga’s credibility, they’ve received high praise from the likes of US News, the Princeton Report, and Kiplinger’s Personal Finance. You can GOOGLE them if you don’t believe me. Ha!

This particular program is not for me, of course. I’m still looking. But thought I’d pass it on for anyone who might be looking for just such an opportunity.

And in case you still are not sold on the idea that technology and social media are changing our lives at home AND in the workplace, here’s a video just for you!

How do you think the programs your kids watch today on tv stand up against what you watched back in your day?  I think about it in passing all the time but today I over heard the words “nether regions” and “num nums” used on a cartoon and I thought, “huh. Not sure how I feel about that.”  To be fair, that was the show “6Teen” which is geared toward teenagers, but still.  Anyway, for fun, I compared TV then to TV now.

The cartoon experience

Remember when Saturday mornings were the highlight of your life?  SCOOBY DOO, LAFF OLYMPICS, & SUPER FRIENDS were my favorites. Then Sundsay night was the Disney feature.  OMG that was so exciting.  Sadly, my kids today have no reason to be excited on Saturday mornings or Sunday evenings because they have all the same shows available to them 24/7.  There is no sense of something special or exclusive.

Same goes for after school.  I couldn’t wait to get home for SPEED RACER & LOONEY TUNES after school each day.  But today I am not aware that there is anything on that they can’t catch some other time.  It’s not necessarily a bad thing that they are NOT glued to the tv after school, it’s just a bummer that they don’t know that excitement we had at cartoon time when it was a more limited commodity.

programming quality

As much as I loved SCOOBY & LOONEY TUNES, though, and feel that scheduling was more exciting in my day, some of the programming is really good.  I really like I-CARLY, ZACK & CODY, and HANNAH MONTANA and can only imagine how I would have looked forward to shows like that in my day.

I would say it is the cartoon programming that gets under my skin. Is it just me or are the voices and sounds really high pitched and irritating?  I despise just hearing POKEMON in the background.  Then we have these visually ugly and depressing shows like CHOWDER, FLAPJACK & COURAGE THE DOG.  Why in the world would someone make these shows?  They are so unpleasant.  Do we really need these images influencing our kids?

Other than Pokemon my kids watch a lot of Boomerang which makes me happy because they are passing on these gloomy shows and instead watching things like THE PINK PANTHER.  That makes me sort of happy.  We really do limit our tv time but it’s hard, especially in the summer, when I work from home and need to create a few blocks of quiet time so I can stay focused.  TV and Wii are the only babysitter/daycare we can afford right now.  Now that I think about it, it’s probably the increased viewing hours this summer that have me so aware of kids programming right now.

What do you think?  Do you ever find yourself shocked by something you see or hear on your kids “kid shows”?

You know why I don’t want to work out at the gym?  The equipment is too crazy! I get intimidated trying to remember how to operate some of the machines, and frankly, I think it’s a little too dangerous! Take a good look at an elliptical machine.  There is just way too much going on for the average person to coordinate.  Two arms and two legs going in different directions.  It’s just not for me.  And how about the treadmill?  Well, actually I love the treadmill but have you seen some of these boneheads falling OFF them?

What is so funny about watching people fall?  I don’t know either, but it sure is!